Sunday, March 12, 2017

Day 2 : Everybody Needs Somebody

Remember the time when I started this additional blog to write something daily no matter what. lol. Anyways, like every absentee father who'd missed his son's birthday party, I promise I'll do better next time.

So what can we talk about tonight? Well, I am back into travelling big. Did a long trip last month. So that was good. Should write something about that soon. And yeah, my spare mobile phone was lot/stolen. Which was not too good. And, one of my friends is getting married. Again. And I mean that literally, one of my friends, somebody that I went to school with is getting into his second marriage right now. Frigging turds on sticks, who'd have thought that. I am at an age now where my friends have been already married, separated, divorced, and remarried. Damn. 

Don't get me wrong, I am happy for this person of course. No friend would wish for another to stick around in a loveless marriage. But heck, come on, why would you even get into one in the first place. Sure you got something good going on. Why overload it with the pressures of matrimony. I know I am not the best person to talk of being married. I might very well be talking about giving birth. Which also I don't know the first thing of. But I have been around people who have been married, and women who have had little human people come out of them. And this is something that both of them have said about the experience, not an easy thing. Both are messy,  loud, emotional and kind of miraculous. 

I mean, finding that one person you'll want to spend the rest of your life with is something of a miracle in itself. We live in age now when people are so desensitized to emotions that we go out of our way to not have to show even an iota of it to another living soul. We can talk about our feelings and vulnerability to total strangers over the internet, but when it comes to sharing with someone whom we run risk of having to talk the next day. We just avoid it. We don't like talking about ourselves. 

No that's not true, we love talking about ourselves a lot. That's pretty much what we do in Facebook and Instagram. But that's not really the real us, not our real life, that is just us faking it to show everyone else how great our lives are. If we were to really talk about us at all, it would be a sad and depressing and lonely. And nobody likes a whiner. Nobody should think of us like that. Whining is for losers, and we are winners. 

Oh, please. 

This friend I was talking of, the one who is remarried now, is a real big shot. Big family business and all that. He used to get dropped to school every day in his dad's long expensive car. Before long he started dating this girl we all had a crush on. Well, you'd think we all feel pretty good now that things have turned out lousy for him. To be honest, yeah. For a minute I think I'd felt something that could be best described as content at watching his life become miserable. 

Just for a few minutes, during the birthday party where he told us about his divorce. Then this big adult guy, started to cry. 

Hard liquor and sorrow and girl trouble are all bad combinations. The crying stuff made this whole debacle seem really unappetizing. 

It immediately sobered up everyone else at the table. We ended up shoving him off in a Uber and had the most silent final rounds in the history of drinks nights. Trust me I have been the sober person in all such nights. This was the most silent room I have been in with drunk guys. I could bet each of these guys was sitting around silently with their glasses in their hand thinking about the one that got away. Most of them have someone back at home. Some have been married or been with their partners for more than six years. But there is always that one person that got away. The emotional relationship that they have with that person would be the longest one they will ever have with anyone else in their lifetime. 

We are all vulnerable when it comes to matters of the heart. And we never share anything for fear of it being considered as a weakness. And being naked like that with someone is scary as hell. We would rather shut ourselves up with all our sorrows and hope it doesn't make us insane. And if not for anything else, just for not having to lock ourselves up in a loony bin. Everybody needs somebody.

Anyways, that guy is married again now. Is off honeymooning in Dubai, I think. Good for him. I might hate him. But I don't envy him his sorrows. Divorce and second marriage in your late 20's. Good luck, mate.

And to those of us who are yet to start on their first (and hopefully only) matrimonial adventure. There you go - even at its worst, this life ain't that bad really. 

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